The First Week Without Alcohol. Day 1-7.

My first 7 days without alcohol

One day without alcohol

So it is now day 1 of not drinking. This time it is for keeps. Here is my journal for my first week without alcohol.

I’ve just woken up at 6 in the morning. I set my alarm for this early because I wanted to make sure that I was tired for tonight. My previous attempts at giving up alcohol tell me that my sleep will be awful tonight. This is the story of the first week without alcohol….day by day.

I have tried to stop drinking before and I’ve always struggled with sleep. So today, I’ve decided to get up at 6 and set the alarm to pre-empt this. The family are all still asleep. I have two children – they’re still in bed. My wife is asleep. It is just me wide awake and in bed, and I’ve woken up now after deciding that last night was the last night of drinking.

I still feel a bit woozy, and this is the day when I’m no longer drinking. I know that it’s going to be painful because every time I have tried to give up before, the first few days have been hard. My plan today is just to try and get through this day without drinking alcohol and with this in mind, I start the day.

It is now 7 in the morning and my children are getting up soon to get ready to go to school. I have just heard the kids shuffling around, and my wife is now moving, getting out of bed to help kids get ready for school.

My plans for today is not do a great deal. Just to get through the day without drinking, and hopefully take the days one by one. I am feeling that feeling after a long session of drinking – my stomach is somersaults, head’s quite sore already and thinking about the fact that normally I’d be planning on what alcohol I’m getting for tonight. Today I am not going to do this – I have made my final decision.

And this is the final decision that I’m not going to drink, which if I am being honest, does scare me but I know it has to be final. My only focus today is to try and avoid alcohol and I’m going to do that by any means possible.

I’m not going to be eating properly today, I already know this. Every time I’m been on a heavy session I struggle to eat anyway, so I am not going to bother to even attempt to eat. My wife knows that now and whenever I have been drinking heavily, she accepts that I probably will not eat that day.

It is now about 11 AM – kids have gone to school and I’m just sat here I’m on a day off work, so I do not have anything planned apart from to just write this all day. I’m writing all about this day because hopefully it’ll help me to look back – step-by-step what happens when I do not drink. Write this, and just try to keep myself occupied.

It Looks like it is coming up to lunchtime now, midday. I am just going to continue and I see this through because usually on a day off when I’m normally off work, I am already contemplating what type of alcohol I’m going to get. I am trying to shake this thought off, to not allow it in my mind. i’m just going to try and get through day 1 without drinking – simple as that.

It is now 2 p.m. in the afternoon. What I did this morning I set up an app on my phone to count how many hours specifically I have been sober for. There are loads of apps out there, I have used some before and really like one called SoberTime. It is totally free, it has adverts but I don’t care about the adverts, well worth using, a good community behind it too which I find has helped me before, so I am using it again.

It has a counter app that gives you small goals so when you hit them, it gives some sort of recognition. It starts small – the first sober 5-minutes and then he goes to the day 3 days, one week, 10 days and so on.

Right now I am on 12 hours without alcohol in my body as I stopped drinking at 3 AM last night, so once but I’ve done it always was quite specific to set it from 0 to 3 in the morning. It’s now 3 PM.

I know from my own previous attempts of giving up drinking that on the first day of a couple of days I get quite ratty and then quite irritable and so I am conscious of this and I am not going to do this. It is not my family’s fault that I am ratty, and I have no right or intention on taking it out on them. The kids come home and say something that I really don’t feel happy about. The wife says something which normally I might disagree with. What I am going to do is just totally ignored by me to put my head into a book. Socially isolating myself might be a good or bad idea but my goal is to get through day 1 without drinking alcohol, so if reading helps then so be it.

Now it comes to tea time. My wife is fully aware that when I try not to drink on my first day that I don’t want to eat. I have mentioned before in previous blogs that I can go 4 days a week plus without consuming about physically consuming any food and drink, which is quite worrying in itself really, and so today – the first day of the first week without alcohol – I’m not going to beat myself up for not eating too much.

I don’t feel hungry. I feel quite sick feel queasy so i’m not going to bother to plan tonight as to try and just get away from everyone, get away from the family and just go to bed early as I can. It is hardly the picture of an ideal father or family man, but I have come to the point that needs must.

I doubt I will be sleeping tonight as I’m going upstairs. I will just lie there and I’m going to try and do the usual things that are the healthiest to promote a good night’s sleep so to speak, and have it which would be to turn the light off early try to read a book, stay away from electrical devices that sort of stuff.

Realistically, all I have got to do is not drink and get through today, and I’ll be happy when I see the app tick over onto day 2.

2 days without alcohol

It is now day 2 without drinking alcohol day

The first thing I did, I woke up from a night of terrible night sleep. I think I went to bed and about 8 pm, went upstairs, stayed away from the family. My wife comes to bed at about 11 after watching some tv. I was still awake when she came to bed, then she went to sleep and I was still awake. I think I saw 1 am then 2 and 3 and then fell asleep at some point today woke up around about 4:05. I got myself up at 5:30. The kids don’t get out of bed so early, so I spent around 2 hours sitting on my phone just trying to ride the time and occupy myself in some way, which ‘alcohol experts’ tell you to do.

In reality, for me, it’s just a case of passing the time and making an hour tick over. It won’t last, right? But it’s clear that if I spent the last 20 or so days having throwing poison inside me, expecting miracles overnight about feeling well today is just not realistic. Breakfast this morning now the kids have got up out of bed. I am trying to be as happy and polite as I can be. I’ve already checked my app and i have now cleared one day without alcohol.

This time I have chosen a week to stop drinking when I am not at work for 4 days- the first 4 days of hopefully being alcohol-free.  The bonus of this for me is I don’t have to worry about being part of ‘normal life’, and all I’ve got to do is get through a few days being alcohol-free and get up and exist. I don’t think I’ll be eating today.

Similar to yesterday it’s now 10 and kids have gone to school I still haven’t eaten anything and still feeling quite numb in general but happy that at least I’m looking at the app and it says that I have done one day and 6 hours without alcohol. Again, it doesn’t sound like much but it all adds up.

I am going to carry on today and my plans are to do very little apart from make sure I do not drink – sounds quite selfish really but the hours without alcohol are slowly building up and i’m going to focus on getting to 2 days on the no drinking app.

No drinking again, another sweaty lack of sleep night last night and probably in bed for 10:00-11:00 pm, and then the children went to bed, then they all went to sleep soundly.

3 days without alcohol

I have now reached three days into my first week without drinking

Today I woke up from a restless, sleepless sweaty night – now day 3 without alcohol. I’ve been sweating for 3 days. I have probably been in the same clothes for all this time. It’s time for me to have a bath so I’m going to get up. It’s 6 in the morning and getting the kids and family is still asleep.

I’m going to get myself up and have a bath, have a shave and try and make myself feel a bit normal. I haven’t had a wash for a couple of days. I do feel hungry but i am conscious that i might not feel well when I’ve eaten so i chose to have some cereal and some weetabix, at least it is something.

Three now without alcohol and probably the first time in god knows how long without tasting alcohol on my breath. The kids are going to get up soon, and then we’re going to go to school today. I’m dressed which is a first time in three days so i’m going to join my wife on the school run. I am going to walk to school with my son and come back and then it’ll be 9 in the morning, and then i’ve got a full day and nothingness.

I’ve already checked my app and I can see that it’s 3 days and 6 hours which is nice to see and yes 3 days without drinking not bad going in my eyes. Long way to go but it is a start.

Now it is midday one funny thing which is happens when I do not drink is something which might be quite disgusted to talk about ….toilet habits My toilet habits, when I’m drinking heavily, is, well, it’s not the most pleasant of experiences. I’m now on day 3 and i’ve just been to the toilet and it worked! it actually worked! Quite a bizarre sensation but there we go. And a sense of bit of normality coming back.

I’m still feeling quite agitated in general, and i’m conscious that I don’t want to get into any deep and meaningful conversations with my wife today, and at day 3 let’s be realistic – 20 years/two decades of alcohol abuse and pouring something in my body physically and making my mind twisted I cannot expect this to be a short-term fix so I avoid normal conversations. If i do feel a deep and meaningful conversation coming on then i do bite my tongue and i hold it in. It is now 3 pa on day 3 without alcohol. My children are coming home from school and again I’m biting my tongue.

I’ve got a 10-year-old a 14-year old child and they are quite erratic as kids are. I am just trying my best to keep myself to myself steady as throughout the day with this in my mind. My focus is just to get through the day without drinking alcohol. It is a trigger for me as drinking is normally around about this time when I have stopped drinking previously.

It is around about the 2-3-4 days is when I think that I have cracked it (the whole drinking addiction, I convince myself of it) and hit the off-licence Maybe it’s because I was feeling physically a little bit better Maybe it’s because I’m feeling that I’ve had a bit more rest and ‘I know now’ that I have cracked it and i don’t have to drink every day, so now I can drink like a ‘normal person’.

For whatever reason, my danger period is around about 3 days. Today I am conscious of this so am trying as hard as I possibly can to power through this day. I am focusing on the old adage of ‘one day for one day at a time’ (ODAAT). l am living directly in the moment i’m trying not to overanalyze any of my emotions this time. This can be a bad thing to do in my opinion, especially when my mind is definitely not thinking straight – how could it be after being under the influence of alcohol for so long. It is purely counting the clock and get through the day.

Tonight I’m going to go to bed at about 8 I will be trying to read listen to audiobooks, anything which will occupy my mind. I’m not expecting to get any sleep really just so I can get through and see that magic day four pop up on my app.

4 days without alcohol

Half a week without booze in my system!

I have Just woken up. It is 5:30 on day 4 without alcohol and I don’t feel great. I don’t feel bad, but I do feel quite emotional.

Today is the first day when I’m at work, real-life commitments, of sorts. I’m currently working from home due to lockdown. My job is working for a call centre so quite strange as jobs go, well new to me anyway so strange for me. My day is filled with people unhappy and customers who i’ll never meet, never met or spoken to before…. and the opening conversation is usually quite aggressive so that is what I’ll be facing all day today. If you have ever worked in a call centre, you will get what I mean. If you have not worked for a call centre, it is a bizarre world.

In general, I felt that i feel more rested in the last 4 days. I will probably have a sleep count of about 6 hours in total in 4 days but this is day 4 without drinking and i’m looking at the app and happy to know that I am making (albeit very slow, but) progress.

I know it’s early days. I’ve been here before but there we are there – 4 non-drinking days. Now I’m going to get on the phones. Time to put the computer on, don my headphones and be prepared for the barrage of abuse.

I’ve always found that when i’ve been drinking over many years, and I can’t switch off for my alcoholic lifestyle, I still manage to continue with work in a professional manner

In hindsight, people probably did notice, colleagues probably did notice. Because I could function, not let people down and attend work responsibilities etc, I thought I was doing OK. Looking back, it was probably obvious to others, telltale physical signs that I was drinking heavy. I worked in environments where drinking heavy was normalised – everyone had a drink after a hard day’s work, so I just carried on.

It is now the end of the my working day I’ve just finished 8 hours at work, and retail on the phone it is almost never happy customers – it is a day of people chasing orders, “where’s my order”,”what’s gone wrong” – it’s almost always a complaint.

Quite often, the opening conversation starts quite aggressive. Mainly, I have just managed to switch off and continue doing the role and I did that today. I’m now the end of the day first. This is the first time I have not drunk after a working day in a long time. This is day for without drinking alcohol and I’m and quite naturally I would go there if you can the beer to sign of the day.

I’m not going to do it on this occasion, so for me that is quite bizarre to not have an ‘ending point’ of the day if you like. I’m just going to switch off my computer and rejoin the family. It is now 8pm, kids are still about, they finished tea and my wife’s up and she’s watching television. I’m going to go up early to bed early. earlier the next hour and i’ll probably just do one of them the last few days not had much sleep and sweaty awful irritable night’s sleep and I’ll wake up at some point early in the morning and get up early in the morning and continue with getting through this first week without alcohol.

5 days without alcohol

I am now on 5 without alcohol for 5 days – 5 days and 6 hours according to my app.

I think a certain at 3 and physically last had my beer which is 3 in the morning 5 days ago and I am starting to feel better and I’ve all booked see you in a bit hungry and breakfast which is nice breakfast and yang so .

I’ve had my breakfast now and for the first time in a can’t remember how long I actually enjoyed my breakfast. My stomach was fine, I don’t feel sick which is a really nice feeling. I am working again today at work from midday till 8 at night, so I have got a few hours so try and get myself together. I do find the fact that i’m working later in the day as I’m not tempted to drink in the morning so that’s made quite a lot easier.

I’m with it being day 5 feeling slight progression come and look at my heart i can’t see the app you sober happened does it in stages it says like me or you go to one day 3 day five days a week 10 days to weeks does it like that it doesn’t stages small bite ability vable goals and I really like that. There are lots of apps out there but this is one which I really like is free. I think they have upgrades haven’t needed to. You have to put up with adverts but they’re not too invasive. I will probably upgrade in the future just to support their community, but for now the free version suffices.

I’m on day five and Friday usually signifies a day of drinking. I think that was back in the early days when I was a younger man. Friday, Saturday, the weekends, you know the same as people tend to do. After a decade of drinking, Fridays and Saturdays didn’t really matter though we just days to me and yeah I did carry on and now and again as an excuse to hammer it, but when you drink throughout a week until really matter depending on the job which she did as well i was doing a Monday to friday job than I felt sorted I had an obligation to myself to have more on the weekends so Friday then Saturday and then it turned into Sunday all-day sessions. Sunday going for a beer garden or for this sitting in the house to watch some television – it blended into one it’s Friday 3 till 8 and my plan is to start working – get shouted at all shift by strangers, and then come off the phones and remain sober.

So now I have done 8 hours on the phones and is now 8pm. I have still got in the back of my mind that I should be drinking – one, because it’s Friday, and two, because it’s the end of the work.

Tomorrow morning I am working for 9 a.m. till 5 a.m. same job working on my phone is getting shouted that it’s like groundhog day. and of course if anyone will tell you to work and not the nicest environment but it is a job.

Ok so I woke up now woke up at 5 again 5 5:30 in the morning 5 in the morning sleepyhead but a certainly remember seeing 00:00 in. I am in 2-3 in and out it’s now 5:30 I start work at 9 I’m against the dark I feel hungry so time to have some breakfast. That is another step in the right direction another back today it’s self-care. I’m and feel better myself. I must admit, I have been quite feeling quite irritable and I haven’t shown that to the family, trying to keep myself in check

6 days without alcohol

6 days and 2 hours without drinking. I’m after so long a long drink and career my wife I think my wife giving a wide berth because she’s fully aware that 6 days in a long time for me to not drink and I don’t think she want to say anything suitable to drop the photo you know doesn’t want to tempt fate i think today I’ll be finished work finishing at 5 on a saturday that’s quite danger period cause here 6 days now 6 days without alcohol and 6 days to me as a massive danger period because i can think while you are away for a week i can justify find some alcohol so let’s I really wash myself through this could be on time and also at the end of this this today I’m not working again for four three more days so got three days off work it is a saturday I might a bit children car and this is going to be a test inside for me and now it’s night shift it is 5 and 17 the kids are happy doing whatever they’re doing they’re off school the wife watching television it’s normal time it’s not easy to cook at night so I haven’t finished work there’s plenty of time to get some alcohol

My usual routine would be to get a crate of beer now, and then some more just to make sure I don’t run out of beer and got myself into that routine for many years.

One thing that I have been trying to do this week is to try and get myself up early and get myself up as early as possible that the intention of the hope I can I will just collapse and go into a decent sleep routine. Whether that does or does not happen I do not know. I’m trying to do all the sensible thing as recommended – relaxing before bed and trying not to watch tv or have any stimulants. I don’t really drink caffeine, coffee or tea anyway but trying to be conscious of what I put in my body before bed – like excessive amounts of sugary foods. Trying to stick with just water some juice occasionally so that’s a bit of a life change as a change for me and this is now day 6 and I’m going to try and go to bed early and be happy with the fact that I am now through 6 days without alcohol.

7 days without alcohol

Hitting a week without drinking – my first week without alcohol:)

Sunday morning and woke up and I feel like I have a nicer, more settled mood than I have done in a long time. It has been absolutely years since I have done a full week without alcohol in a 7-day period.

It’s 5:30 in the morning i’m forcing myself to get up out of bed, even though I probably only went to sleep at about 4 am. I set the alarm to get myself up at 5:30 to get myself out of bed i do not want to be lying in bed but always in my mind it’ll make it that much more difficult to try and get to sleep again tonight.

I have done 7 days without alcohol, and I’m looking on my app I can see this and it’s a nice feeling. Maybe in the ‘real world’ it is not the greatest of achievements but for me it is the longest I think I’ve gone without alcohol I care toremember. 7 days without alcohol, it maybe a year more than a year since I have gone this long… don’t know.

All I know is that I’m fully committed to this. I’ve spent far too long drinking my life away and feeling sick and going in constant circles. Now i’m going to make this carry on and carry on, and i’m going to try and make a difference for me and for my family and for anybody who is around me. It is very early days but my stomach feels better. I have been going to the toilet better that i’m my started too (bleugh, I know…but it is a real issue when drinking heavily. Three meals a day over the last couple of days – again I can’t remember when I’ve done without feeling sick. Twice in a week which makes sound disgusting but that’s the life of an alcoholic I suppose. My plans for today are again just let the time pass. I think I’m going to it’s actually quite easy to lose focus and expect the world to just be better for me. and once you can expect a few all great but you’ve got to do I have to remember that it is a very very slow process and my first week without alcohol in the grand scheme of things.

Hitting 7 days sober is just another week to the normal person. 7 days sober to me is massive but in the space that short space of time from someone who can’t sleep at all, who always feels rough. Someone who hasn’t been eaten regularly now I’ve got a bit more regularly. I’m slightly cleaner and I’m very interested to see how I am up on week 2, and hopefully, week 3. For now until you think i’m going to heavily rely on the app. I find that useful to count down and when the hours and minutes ago and slow how much they have done through the days and nights then i think that has been really helpful. I’m also journaling this journey which is what I’m doing now. I have found it very useful and it’s certainly kept me occupied throughout these past 7 days. I am going to continue to do this.

That was my account of my first week without alcohol. It was written as I went along. It was quite disjointed at times, but hopefully, this will give a true insight of how I found the first 7 days getting rid of alcohol from my body and my life.